Summer of Friends and Fun Trips

What an eventful (and hectic!) summer we had! Probably because we went to California to visit Adam's family two months in a row, and then went to Utah to visit my family two months in a row, things felt extra fun, but also a little hard to keep up with! While I am sad that I probably won't be able to visit my family or friends until next summer - 9 whole months away! - it is a relief that we will be traveling less for a while.

In July, we visited Adam's family in Soledad, CA (near Salinas) for the annual summer get-together. We had a lot of fun, and Lily especially enjoyed the time with Nana, Papa, and her cousin Amelia. Then we returned in August to welcome Travis (Adam's youngest brother) home from his LDS mission to Maceio, Brazil.

One month later in September, I took Lily to Utah for our annual summer visit, and especially so I could meet my dad's (then) fiancee, Elizabeth. We had a wonderful time, and Lily was ever so excited to return for in October for my dad's wedding, which was marvelous. But I have to say, a major trip every month since July has almost made we swear off traveling! Am I the only person who goes crazy when I come home to no clean clothes and no food in the fridge and piles of bills to pay and boatloads of other random things to catch up on? I always feel like I have to do a week's worth of household tasks in one day, and it makes me nuts! But probably after a few months of being stuck here in the Oregon winter gloom, I will be desperately wishing to go visit somewhere.

Here are some pictures of our adventures this summer, playing with friends, traveling, and adventures playing with friends while traveling. Actually, they are mostly pictures of Lily doing those things, but she's the cutest one anyway.

Lily really likes helping around the house, especially "washing" dishes. Although not always effective in cleaning the dishes themselves, it is a very effective means for cleaning the chair and the floor and Lily, or at least getting them soaking wet so mom has to clean them afterwards. 

Family photos! 

This is a picture of Adam's family, for the first time in its entirety since the little girls were born. 

Welcome home uncle Travis! 

Lily was almost as excited about riding the bus at the airport as she was about visiting relatives. 

This is Lily and her current "best friend", Molly, whose family is in our ward and lives a few doors down. They play together on almost a daily basis, and Lily practically goes into withdrawals if she doesn't see Molly for more than 24 hours. Their favorite recreation is to sit in Molly's doll cribs. Too bad Lily doesn't like her own crib this much ...

They also think it's fun to "study" Adam's textbooks in bed. 

(Just wait til you get to college girls! The studying will never end.)

We seized our last opportunity to go camping this summer and took a trip to Cascadia at the beginning of September. The swimming hole would have been fabulous if it were 15 degrees warmer outside, but Lily still had lots of fun.

This is Lily anticipating a BYU football party. She is such a little Cougar fan! She can sing the end of the fight song and frequently runs around saying "Go cougars!" We also apparently have so much BYU apparel that Lily thinks any print on a piece of clothing says "b-i-u".

This is Lily watching a BYU football game. Don't ask me why, but she seems to actually enjoy it! She sometimes turns on the TV herself and gets excited if a football game is playing, and her attention span for something she cannot possibly comprehend is surprisingly long. She also talks about football. One day, the first thing she said upon waking up at 6 am was "watch fip-ball game!". And a few nights ago, as I was putting her to bed, she told me she wanted to play football with Jesus. At least we're teaching her about all the most important things in life!

This is Lily helping strain berries to make jam at my grandma's house in Mackay, Idaho. Lily really loves her Great Grandma Evelyne, or "deet ef-lint" as she calls her.

Lily was enthralled by feeding the ducks at Salem pond,

and had a marvelous impromptu princess party with my friend Amberly's girls, 

Katelyn and Lizzie, during our trip to Utah.

Amberly also introduced Lily to her favorite pastime in the entire world (yes, even above playing in doll cribs and watching football): riding horses! The ponies at Thanksgiving Point have become a requisite tradition which we repeat every time we go to Utah. Lily talks about this on almost a daily basis.

In between all our trips out of state, my dear friend and former roommate, Candice, came to visit us with her son Bennett. Lily and Bennett are only two months apart in age, but have never met until now! They had a wonderful time together. We made Halloween cookies,

went on walks in the park, 

read books together, and had an all-around great time! Lily's favorite part? Wearing Bennett's fire engine pajamas to bed. She really wants a pair.

We also visited the pumpkin patch!  

Lily picked out her very own pumpkin, which we severed from the vine and prepared to purchase.

Then Lily found a "cute little pumpkin", which she wouldn't let go of, so we finally gave in and cut it from its vine as well. 

Then, of course, she found a "tiny baby pumpkin" which she couldn't live without. Needless to say, Daddy, Mommy, and Lily all left with their very own pumpkins.

We have had a wonderful summer and fall season! We have enjoyed visiting everyone, in spite of the little bits of stress, and will miss everybody for the next 9 months! But they will be productive: I play to stay home and cook up this bun in the oven!

Exciting News!!

Announcement! Actually, two announcements (twice the fun!):

First, we are having another baby! Yes, Lily is going to become a big sister in April, and she is very excited about it. She frequently pats my tummy and says "Baby come out y hold you." Then we have to explain that the baby is not big enough yet, but that she can hold it when it does come out. I am fifteen weeks along, so we have a ways to go. Maybe that's a good thing because I'm going to need all the time I can get to prepare for chasing two little munchkins around this place. I hope I don't go crazy! But we are very excited and can't wait to meet our sweet little #2!

Let me also say that I know it is so hard for all those of my friends and family who have struggled to have children, and I am so sorry! It is difficult for me to share this happy news, knowing how hard it is for some to hear it. My heart goes out to you. Adam and I were in that position for only one year, and I know that is not very long, but it was long enough to know that it hurts. I wish I could somehow share this blessing, but that is not possible, so I will continue to pray for you regularly.

The second piece of happy news is that my dad is getting married! Okay, this is not news for many of you since he got engaged at the end of August, and is getting married in less than two weeks. But it is still so exciting! He is getting married to a wonderful woman who lives in Orem, Utah. She is an elementary school teacher, a fun and beautiful person, plays the piano very well, and has never been married before (no, she is not in her 20s or 30s, in case you were wondering. She is almost the same age as my dad). I am so excited for her! I feel that this is a wonderful opportunity for our family to provide her with the chance to be a wife and grandmother, even though she will never have children of her own, and of course my dad will be much better off with a wife. And Lily needs a grandma who can be here for her physically, so I think it is going to work out great.

Of course, everyone I have told has asked if I feel okay about it. You can probably tell from the previous paragraph that I am happy about this occasion. Personally, I feel that if my dad stayed single forever, of course it wouldn't bring my mom back and he would just be miserable and lonely all the time. Getting married is not going to make my mom any more gone than she already is. Don't get me wrong; I really miss her a lot and I know he still does too. He does not love my mom any less because he is getting married to someone else. I just feel like he has something to be happy about now in between his moments of being very sad, instead of being sad all the time.

That being said, I recognize that not everyone in my family probably feels the same way as I do about this. And that is okay. Everyone deals with grief differently, and if this feels like moving on too quickly, that is perfectly valid. But I do feel that our family needs a "mother-type figure" and that in the end, it will be the best thing for all of us. We will just need to make sure to keep my mom's memory alive and remember that she is just as much a part of our family as she ever was. She is still close in spirit, and I know she is happy for my dad.

So our family will be getting a little bigger in the near future! We are excited about these big changes.

As for some every-day kinds of news, Lily is as cute and funny as ever. She frequently wants to sing the "Happy Clappy Song" (If You're Happy and You Know It). She loves her Book of Mormon board book and calls is Book-it Mornin'. She can count to ten, and always counts all the way to ten, regardless of how many items there actually are to count. She loves to wear her "pa-pack" (backpack), and will put it on and say "Bye-bye, see later!" and then go pretend to put her toy key in the door lock as if she's headed off to school like her daddy.

Lily has been telling me about her dreams lately. One morning, she woke up and said, "Jesus help man so sick feel all better." I asked her if she had a dream about Jesus helping a sick man and she said yes. After that afternoon's nap, she woke up talking about flying in an airplane. And the next day, as I was trying to wake her up, she said with her eyes still closed, "I don't like bandaid." Probably the result of a traumatic visit to the doctor's office.

Lily loves singing primary songs when I play, and frequently asks to "play plee-nano". She then wanders around the house singing bits of the songs at the top of her lungs, which is hilarious. Whenever we ask her a question (and she doesn't scream NO!), she will respond, "Oh! Yes." Lily is very sad that the season for picking "black-blayas" is over. And for some reason, she enjoys football, and periodically requests to "Watch fip-ball game."

It is somewhat bittersweet to know that the time I have alone with Lily is limited. I know it will be hard on her to not be the center of attention. But I'm so grateful for all the time we've spent together, and I won't love her any less just because there is another little one around. Hopefully she appreciates the playmate.

Grateful for the Temple

I am grateful for the temple. I am not intending to write a long discourse on all the reasons why, although I could do that. But I have just felt so much gratitude for it lately, since Lily keeps bringing that sacred place to the forefront of my mind.

We were able to visit the Portland Temple at the end of last month. Normally we go every month, but because of the play we were in, we were not able to go in July. So it had been a while. We always take Lily since we don't have anyone to watch her for the six hours it takes to get there and back. But I don't mind. We take turns and it works out. It will be a little harder when the rain starts pouring incessantly for months on end, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

The day we went happened to be the first Saturday the temple had been open since a three-week long closure during August. Naturally, this meant that there were literally vast hoards of wedding guests and many pairs of starry-eyed brides and grooms roaming the temple grounds. Lily and I had fun looking at all of the brides in pretty white dresses.

I told her "Lily, they just got married."
Lily: Ma-yad.
Me: Yes, they got married in the temple, just like mommy and daddy.
Lily: Ma-yad in da tam-po.
Me: Yes, and because Mommy and Daddy got married in the temple, we can be a family forever! Lily, do you know who else got married in the temple? Papa and Nana got married in the temple. And so did Grandpa and Grandma.
We then went through lists of all our relatives who had gotten married in the temple, and Lily was very excited. Of course then she listed Daniel (my brother) and Tyler (Adam's brother), and we talked about how they (and Travis, Adam's other brother) were going to get married in the temple someday.
And then she said the most adorable thing: "Lily married in the temple some-day."
Me: Lily, you want to get married in the temple someday?
Lily: Yes!

Of course this brought tears to my eyes. I know she doesn't really understand what that means. But she knows it is something special and happy, and something she wants to do to be like the people she loves so much in her family. I can't think of many goals I would prefer her to have. Since then I have thought a lot about how impactful these early experiences can be on little children. I believe that they understand more than we can tell, and that they can feel the Spirit even at such a tender young age. Lily may not comprehend the importance of her goal, but she now has that goal in the back of her mind - to get married in the temple someday. She has repeated that statement many times since our visit to the temple, and it's clear that it made an impression on her mind. I hope that this positive encounter will be a foundation for future experiences that can lead to a life of temple worthiness, and to the concrete goal of temple marriage.

Lily has also reminded me of my gratitude for the temple in another, more spontaneous way. She keeps bringing me my phone and asking me to call Grandma for her.

Of course this is hard for me. I always explain to her that we can't call Grandma because Grandma died and now she is with Jesus in heaven. I try to tell her that she can talk to Grandma if she wants, but we can't call her on the phone. One day, she was so insistent that I finally just looked up a video of my mom's radio show on youtube and let her watch it for half an hour. It's hard that she doesn't understand. I honestly didn't think she would remember my mom long enough to be able to talk about her. I know Lily's memories are probably indistinct, but the fact that she feels enough connection to my mom to want to talk to her on the phone is very significant to me.

It is so sweet to hear her say "Lily loves Grandma" when she sees a picture of my mom. The knowledge that Lily's relationship with my mom was cut so short has been one of the hardest parts of losing her. Almost every time Lily talks about her it makes me cry. Then of course Lily gets worried and comes to give me a hug and says "Mommy happy. Mommy happy!" She doesn't like it when I cry.

But I am always comforted by the knowledge that my mom is close by. Even though we can't be with her, she can experience these sweet moments with Lily, and I am so grateful. I don't know what I would do without that knowledge. The understanding that we can be together again, and that Lily can develop the relationship that was ended too soon, is more comforting to me than anything else.

So I am grateful for the temple. It is the source of so much of the happiness in my life, and a source of comfort for my sorrow. I feel so blessed to live in a time when we have access to abundant temples around the world. I am grateful that my parents were married in the temple. And I am grateful that Lily has started to catch the vision of what a beautiful part of her life the temple can be someday.

"Pan Costs Money?" + Lots of Pictures

So this morning I had the following exchange with Lily:

Me: Lily, eat your toast.

Lily: Why?

Me: Because you are hungry.

Lily: Why? (This word has been a significant part of her vocabulary lately)

Me: Because you didn't eat anything all night so you need some breakfast.

Lily: (Looks at her toast) Cost money.

Me: (pause, surprised) . . . Yeah, does food cost money?

Lily: Yes, money (looks toward the sound of Adam in the shower)

Me: Does Daddy have money?

Lily: Yes

Me: Does Lily have money?

Lily: (shakes her head) No

Me: Does Mommy have money?

Lily: (giggling) No

Me: Yes she does! A little anyway. Lily, how do you know that food costs money?

She just smiles.

Me: Does living in this house cost money?

Lily: Yes

Me: Does driving a car cost money?

Lily: Yes

Apparently, Lily knows that eating pie at a restaurant (we went out for pie with Lily last night), and buying toys at the store cost money, but that going for a walk, singing, giving hugs, and playing hide-and-seek don't. I was beyond surprised that she answered all of them correctly. So I laughed and went in the back to tell Adam that Lily was learning about finances and the economic system. 

When I returned, I asked Lily: Do you like your toast?

Lily: Pan!

Me: What? Pan? What do you mean?

Lily: Pan!

Me: Do you mean bread? Pan?

Lily: Yummy pan! (Grins and takes a huge bite)

Me: Bien dicho, Lily! Te amo.

I know I have mentioned trying to teach Lily Spanish, but we have been very inconsistent lately, although there are some things we always do in Spanish like read scriptures. There are several words she consistently uses, like "mas" (more), "luna" (moon), and "agua" (water). But neither Adam nor I have said the word "pan" to her for months. And I have no clue how Lily actually knows (or guesses right) what costs money and what doesn't. We certainly haven't talked about that. I don't know how she gets some of this stuff, but it makes me smile.

Here's a whole bunch of pictures I was too busy to post earlier.

These are from our campus walk on Mother's Day.

At a park on a road trip to Idaho.

Family reunion!

Lily wants to go backpacking ...

At Hearst Castle with Adam's family.

At a farmer's market in Monterey with Adam's family.

Lily swimming with her Nana!

Lily decided to put on makeup like Mommy.

"This is WAY more fun than riding in my carseat!"

At the playground with Uncle Will.

Picking blueberries with my dad when he came to visit:

At the local swimming hole. Lily had a blast!

Lily's Stage Debut; Mommy's Backstage Debut

Well, it has been a loooong time since I have written on this blog, which is a shame because lots of things have been happening. Well, mostly one really big thing, which is in fact the reason I haven't written on this blog for so long. That thing is called Promised Valley, aka "the play". I have been heavily involved in our stake's 50th anniversary musical representation of the Mormon Pioneers' trek west. The musical was originally written to commemorate the 100th anniversary of the pioneers arriving in the Salt Lake Valley. It has been a lot of fun, and it literally took over my entire life for more than two months.

I auditioned for the play at the beginning of April, but because the director knew I might have to go to my mom's funeral sometime this summer, she put me in the chorus without a part for fear that I might be gone the week of the performances. Then soon after, I did have to go to Utah for the funeral, and was very glad to not have to worry about the play. But when I got back, I learned that the musical director for the play had been a complete disaster. She is a wonderful pianist, but apparently knows nothing about choral music and the practices were completely unproductive and frustrating. She was also too busy to commit, and after a few weeks simply backed out. So they used several different people temporarily to fill in, and by the time I got back, the overall music comprehension was in a terrible state. The director literally begged me to take over the music, and I reluctantly agreed.

Little did I know. Since I had been gone for three weeks, I knew less of the music than anyone in the chorus. At my first practice, before I had even had time to look over the music, at the director's request we dived headlong into the most difficult piece, and I was more than completely overwhelmed. It was SO DIFFICULT!! It would have been an interesting, but demanding, challenge to learn it myself. But to teach it to others was completely over my head! This piece literally changed time signatures multiple times on almost every one of 18 pages. It switched constantly from cut time to 4:4 to 3:4 to 2:4, so it was infuriating to count. The tempos changed multiple times, and all but the last two pages were so dissonant that just learning the melody line was difficult, let alone the harmonies. The accompaniment was also dissonant and lacked coherent melody, so entrances were incredibly hard, and there was intermittent dialogue that completely threw off the music if they didn't say the lines at exactly the right time.

So I practiced conducting at home, listened to the CD recording, and counted out rhythms for literally hours. We hammered out parts over and over and over during rehearsal, in additional to the many other difficult (but not as difficult) numbers we had to learn, and we eventually got them down. In fact, in the end, this terrible beast was our best number! It had the most choreography, was the most dramatically interesting, and sounded the best because we had practiced it so much. But all the numbers sounded really good, and it made me so proud of everyone's hard work. I have to say that I was completely humbled by the experience, but in the end it was so exhilarating to know that we had conquered it, and that I helped bring something about that seemed impossible at the beginning. It was so much fun, and I am sad that it's over.

But it's also a relief to be done. Lily's sleeping schedule was turned on its head. This is primarily because Lily was in the play with me. I wasn't planning on this, but I had to bring her a few times, and the director thought she was so cute that she wanted her in the performances. Lily LOVED being on stage. She learned many of the words to the songs and would try to sing along, she would help me pretend to gather firewood into a basket in the first scene, and she knew when to look sad. She knew exactly when to put her arms up at the end of a few numbers, and often did it before anyone else. Then she would clap enthusiastically. She enjoyed it so much that she cried when we were offstage because she wanted to go on. Almost everyone I talked to said she was their very favorite part of the play, and many mentioned how impressed they were at her stage presence. Every time I have seen the director since (she's in my ward, so that's often), she tells me about more people who have asked her about that "incredibly adorable little, little girl in the play who was their favorite part" and demanded to know why she wasn't in the program.

Here we are "Going West!"

She doesn't look that enthusiastic in these pictures. That's because Adam took them all at the first dress rehearsal when she was SUPER tired.

I guess it is unusual to see toddlers in plays, since they are so unpredictable. It was VERY stressful to have to with me, since I never knew if she was going to suddenly bolt off the edge of the stage, or run behind another cast member and get stepped on, have a diaper explosion onstage, or throw an unexpected tantrum. But none of those things ever happened, although I had to bribe her a number of times with fruit snacks during various parts of the production.

In our Winter Quarters costumes, playing in the nursery room between scenes.

So it is nice to have my life back. I am trying to get caught up on all the stuff that got completely neglected during the month of having 6 rehearsals per week. Lily misses it profoundly though. She still asks me to "go west" and begs to go to play practice. She has been singing vigorously every day since the play ended, and it's funny because she belts it out so loud. One day she sang at the top of her lungs (mostly gibberish with random words mixed in about mommy, daddy, swimming, cookies, kitties, going west, and other phrases from the play) for more than 20 minutes continuously while we were outside on a walk. People on their front porches kept looking around trying to see where that noise was coming from, and they laughed when they realized it was emanating from the 1 1/2-year-old in my stroller. I got a little snippet of one morning serenade on video: